Shopping Blues

So I went window shopping this week.  Actual "window" shopping.  I wanted to take a gander at the window displays of the stores at the mall and the stand-alone stores.  Talk about underwhelming!  It had been quite a while since I'd done this.  I believe that stores have forgotten the art of the window display.  And, the art of the in-store display.  There were far too many headless mannequins with absolutely BORING clothes draped loosely on their form.  There was nothing that even remotely made me interested enough to purchase anything.  Nothing.  That is some sort of pitiful commentary on the state of retail clothing.  How are we supposed to decide what we want to buy?  How do we know what is 'in' or 'cute'?  I suppose that leaves us with sales fliers, magazine ads and tv ads.  Yuck. 

This creates a serious dilemma. Truly serious. Anything that you see in a magazine spread (and there are some good looking outfits) will be both unaffordable (have you checked out the prices, if they dare put the prices on the page) and/or no longer available.  They like to put loads of clothes on the models from the H&M store.  The problem with That is - you can't order H&M on line - each store carries a different  block of clothes - the item you see was only available at the store for one week because they don't re-order or restock the items they photographed - you lose.  You may love the piece, but you can't get it. And let's not get started on those prices!  I am not sure if many of these editors even 'visit' the real world.  The majority of people don't have access to an unlimited clothing fund.  Too many times I read about "affordable" outfits - and the prices hover around $400.  That is not affordable.  That is not reasonable. 

There are loads of stores on-line now as well.  You can have unlimited companies send you urgent e-mails notifying you of immediate sales on-line.  They tease you with adorable outfits, you quick-link to the site and find that your size is unavailable since they sold out of everything in a mere 15 minutes. You have no time to think about a purchase - you have to click and buy.  That is not shopping.  That is a stick-up. 

Then there are the sales fliers from your local stores.  Ho-hum.  I have looked at so many of them that I am blurry-eyed.  The clothes all look the same.  All of them.  And none of them are really fashionable, desirable, extra cute or unique.  It is your job as a fabulous gal - to be wondrous and unique.  That is a huge part of why I shop resale shops and thrift.  You will find what others won't.  You can put yourself together in such a great and inexpensive way that others have to take notice.

Let's get together for a shopping expedition.  Gather your buddies and contact me for a scheduled shopping excursion.  You will benefit, your friends will benefit and you will do it for pennies on the dollar!
Then be Amazing!

This outfit is a black spandex little top for $3.  People really like this very flowy,  lavender print Emmanual Ungaro skirt - $6.96!

Today I am wearing some plum colored J Vincent heels - $15.00.

A velvet, plum bracelet - $3.00.

God bless you richly.  I know that He has blessed me!

You Enjoy Being a What?

What image do you want to convey to the world?  To your mate?  To your parents?  To your employer?  To yourself?  Do you even have an idea?  Well, think about it.  We've discussed before that what you wear makes that impression - whether you want it to or not.  Whether you Intend it to, or not.  It does.  Sometimes that impression can be permanent and hard to erase in the minds of others.

Someone commented recently that perhaps a few of my readers may wonder why there are no photos of me in anything but dresses and skirts.  Well, there are a few reasons - but for the initial purpose of this post, it is because that is the impression that I want to convey to the world at large.  I enjoy being a lady.  You should enjoy who you are (and it should be someone amazing and memorable in only the best ways). 

I can definitely state that if I have ever had an incident of a flat tire on a roadway, that the minute I step out to examine the damage, people will stop to help me.  And continue to stop to give me assistance until the situation is resolved.  I have to believe that (other than the general goodness of Texas folks), the moment someone sees a lady in a ladylike dress and heels needing some aid - they make Sure that aid is offered.  I have had more than one female acquaintance let me know that they are Never offered assistance in such situations.  Sad.  One wanted to know why I always got help.  Well, if you always look like a lady, there will always be someone earnestly Wanting to Help.  If you run around looking unladylike, they are more prone to pass you by (sorry, but true).  Now, needing a tire changed (by someone else) is NOT the reason I dress like a lady, but it is certainly one of the benefits. I do know how to change a tire (but I don't like icky) and manage crisis (and no one likes crisis) when they arise, but friendly help is always welcome.

I have also witnessed first hand (and second hand), that if you are the one who holds up a higher standard of appearance, then others will follow suit.  They will.  Try it as an experiment.  You'll see (and secretly know that YOU are making a difference!) - folks will take notice and you may be surprised at the sudden improvement of the people environment around you.  It's almost like a contest.  It's not a contest, but in full blown reality - the less fabulous dressed will find a reason to 'up their game'.  And then you have made the world a better place by just dressing great!  How easy was that?!

If you have difficulty putting together an outfit (the number one complaint I receive) - contact The Closet Fairy and we will remedy that little problem.

God bless you richly.  I know that He has blessed me!

An overview since March 1, 2012

May I Compliment You On Your Stunning Neckline?

Every gal has at least one 'very complimentary neckline'.  No matter your height, width, neck, chest, shoulders, back - you name it - there is a neckline silhouette that is flattering for you.  How many times have you put on a top or dress and bemoaned the fact that it just didn't look right at the top.  Too often it is because the neckline doesn't really flatter your 'picture frame' area.  More often, people ignore the fact that the neckline they are prancing around with it just not the best one for them.

How do you know what is right or perfect? 
This is something I recommend to everyone I work with:
1. Head to the mall because there is an abundance of stores (you are NOT going to purchase anything).
2. Keep focused on not buying anything - and head to the ladies TOP department.
3. Walk around to more than one department (don't just stand in the sportswear section).
4. Pick out every conceivable different style of neckline you see:
    Boat neck; Jewel; Square; Sweetheart; V-neck; Zip-front with collar; Cowl; Portrait; Turtleneck; Mock-    turtle; Scoop; Deep scoop; Peter Pan; Polo; Button-front without collar; (there's more)
5. Go into the dressing room and put them on!! (I am tired of hearing you whine that you don't like to try on  clothes - just Do it).
6. Actually look at your Upper Torso and Face only.  You are not trying to decide if you want to purchase the top.
7. Be open and objective.  Just because you have never worn that type of neckline before does not mean that you shouldn't try it on.
8. Suddenly, it will hit you like bag of hammers when that perfect neckline is reflected back to you.
9. You will also have benefited from viewing the necklines that were Not so perfect. 

Rules:  (Yes, there are some very basic rules that you have to abide by, no matter what).
1. If you have a very thick and/or short neck - Leave the jewel neckline alone.  It is not your friend.  You can't make it your friend.  You will always look uncomfortable and stubby headed (not a good look for anyone).
2. If you have very wide shoulders - Square necklines will only amplify the look.
3. Two fleshy mounds that heave above your neckline is NOT RIGHT EVER.  That neckline silhouette is too low and not the perfect one for you.  Remember that you are Not a Tart.

Armed with this new magical knowledge, you can shop so much smarter.  You can dress so much smarter.  You are a smart gal - show it!

When you find your perfect 'picture frame', your world will be a better place. I promise.
Let me know if you have had a revelation about your neckline.

God bless you richly.  I know that He has blessed me!

She said What?

Have you ever been insulted in one of those back-handed ways?  Where the people weren't trying to insult you, but that was the complete result?  I have.  Repeatedly.  It seems that somehow people just feel comfortable exhibiting their Tourette's tendencies if it involves me.  Oh well.

Do you remember, back in the late eighties and early nineties when women of all shapes and sizes went to have their 'colors' read?  You know, a 'consultant' laid all of these different swathes of fabric under your neck and across your chest to determine what 'season' you were.  You had an option of the four - spring, summer, fall, winter.  This test established which colors were the most flattering on you.  At the conclusion of this wonderful experience, you would receive a small booklet with your 'best' colors and then you could head to the mall and never, ever again pick the 'wrong color' for you!  How great!  You should avoid all of the other colors as they didn't bring out your 'best'.  If it wasn't in your color swatch - ignore it completely.  Imagine how easy that made things for people (if you could find your specific color of red, blue, green, etc). 

So, like many women who wanted to make sure I stayed stylish, I went to have my colors done in 1992 (I still remember the name of the consultant).  After sitting patiently while the very pretty specialist laid out all of the colors from each season against my skin - she said "Hmmm."  Then she did the procedure over again. Then again.  Finally (here comes the insult) she said, "I have never had this happen.  You have No good colors."  What??!! She said it quite calmly and dead-panned in spite of the fact that this just hadn't happened to her before: that I had no good colors. It never occurred to her that she had just left me in a daze.  There was nothing that looked good on me - nothing.  There was no way in the world I could ever look good!  How disheartening.  How jaw-dropping.  How insulting that she would say it out loud in front of me! Um - now what?  What were my alternatives?  She suggested that I "just do the best you can". (Not joking).  I remember walking quite shell-shocked to my car.  Where I cried.  How do you resolve the fact that Nothing looks flattering on you?  There is not a single color or season or tone that works for you.  You are without hope to ever look outstanding.  I let that sink in.

Then I took action.  If this was my fate, I decided to look at things from a completely different perspective.  They were wrong.  I didn't have 'best' color/season because they were all wonderful.  They all looked fabulous, that's why she couldn't find one that was better than the others.  My whole attitude changed and I promise the world took notice. Now, I KNEW that without a doubt I could look fantastic.  Period. How dare anyone say that there was no way I could look good.  I could.  You can.  No matter how pitiful, unattractive, disheveled, sloppy you feel (or worse, people tell you) - you CAN look great.  You can be marvelous in spite of them.  There is something that you can do.  But first, it has to start with You and your attitude - internally.  When you are determined to look good, you will.  You may need help getting there - but it is absolutely possible to walk out your door so that the world takes notice in a positive way. If you need help, then contact me and we will make you fabulous. There is hope. 

God bless you richly.  I know that He has blessed me.

What is a Girl to do?

What is a girl to do every day?  First you get/fall/tumble out of bed and in a dazed stupor while mentally going over the list of things you have to accomplish in order to walk out the door and head to work, you wander to your closet and decide what to wear for the day.  Can you already see how dangerous this is?  The words "dazed stupor" are a hint.  One of the most important things you will do all day is put yourself together to greet the world - and you do it through half-closed, hair-covered eyes while distractedly thinking about something else altogether.  There are so many important things you Must do before leaving the house - find your purse, call the school to make sure there is money in the kiddos lunch account, feed the dog, let the dog out to take care of business, grab the utility bill you must drop off Today, find your keys, make sure you have the paperwork for your meeting at 10:00, try to make a mental note of the grocery items you need to pick up for dinner, remember to call the insurance company, did the kids say they had a project due in two days?  It is no wonder you get into the car and look down to see that your clothes absolutely do Not match.  At all. Sadly, this has happened before.

Most of the time, we gals put ourselves pretty far down the list of things to take care of.  Why? 
That old adage, "if Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" is so very true.  If you start your day knowing that you don't look great because you seriously don't match, your clothes don't fit, the dog just jumped all over you and left paw-prints everywhere, you realize you are wearing the top you wore Yesterday - and it smells, or you realize you just hate your outfit - then things do not bode well for the rest of your day.  Why do we need to start our day badly?  We don't.  We shouldn't.  We Won't!  Be absolutely resolute in that final statement:  We Won't start our day badly.  We will have a plan for ourselves.

How many of us have read some article about planning ahead which includes:

1. Laying out your outfit for the next day (a smart idea)
2. Have all your clothing "basic" (Boring)
3. Have all your clothing monotone (Even more boring)
4. Reduce your wardrobe to 10 core items (What? I really did see this on a television show)
5. Let your small child pick out your clothing (almost always guaranteed to be unacceptable).

Let's tackle these items.
1.  You don't have to actually pick out every single piece of clothing for the next day - but it is to your advantage to at least have a good idea of What you want to wear before you fall asleep.  While you are still lucid, you can remember if that clothing item is dirty or the button is missing (because you aren't going to remember in the morning and you will search everywhere in vain yanking things willy-nilly and making yourself more stressed and tardy - or you will actually find the item, wear it and have to safety pin yourself back together).
2.  More money managers are telling people to wear 'basic' clothing as a way to "save".  Pooh.  Somehow they expect you to throw out all items of clothing you already own so that anything else you may purchase (which they don't advise) will automatically fit into your 'basic' color scheme.  Blech.  Wearing beige, black or brown every day is just wrong.  No one will say you look great.  Why?  Because there is no difference from what you had on every day before.  They can't tell you have any sort of clothing personality except "Bland".  Is that your clothing choice description?  No?  Then don't listen to the folks who have no sense of style. No one tells them they look great or good or even memorable.
3.  Please see #2 - only now your clothing choice has been reduced to a single color.  Hmm. Not an option. (really, where do these folks come from who suggest these things?)
4.  I have seen and heard this ditty voiced frequently by more than one individual who should purchase a mirror and look at how absolutely drab/boring/repetitive/non-stylish/blah(how many adjectives are there for this word?) they present themselves to the public.  You are allowed to have clothes that look fabulous!  Ignore those who proclaim otherwise.  You are your Core Item.  Build from that. 
5.  Does this really need tackling?  You don't look good in the "Cinderella" top.

Mentally choose your outfit in the evening while you can still think clearly.  Without a doubt, you will be far more successful the next morning and thereby be more fabulous and happy with the world.  As stated above, You are your core item and I am certain that you are not boring.  You are fabulous and should look it. 

Let me know if there is something specific you would like discussed.

God bless you richly.  I know He has blessed me!

It's a Fad, Fad, Fad, Fad World!

Don't succumb to fads.  Just don't do it.  You see them coming like a freight train.  Suddenly all the 'kids' start wearing, let's say, tie-dyed pants.  You see them Everywhere.  Wisely at first, all you can think is 'Yuck! Those look awful! Why do they wear those?' But brains are tricky things and after just a few months of this visual overload, your brain apparently slides sideways and shifts gears, and what-do-you-know, those pants don't look so bad.  Then, those pants start to look good...you know, if you got the right color for you. So you head down to the mall and search for the perfect tie-dyed wonders for your posterior and thighs.  Not surprisingly, you eventually Do find those things in your favorite color.  You slide them up and over your womanly curves.  You view yourself from every angle and smile with delight at how 'hip' and 'cool' you look (okay, that already defines you as NOT 'hip & cool').  Ooooo.  You are getting younger by the second.   You make your way to the checkout counter and against your better judgment just a few months ago, you actually purchase the latest fad for your very own.  Aww. 

Now what do you do with them?  You really can't wear them to church because they are too 'casual' and you are supposed to be more respectful of church; you can't wear them to the PTA because they really are too 'young' and someone might snicker; you can't wear them to work because the actual young adults are wearing them - and again you face that snicker issue; you can't wear them to where you volunteer because you don't want to appear to have fallen into the Fad trap; you can't wear them---wait, now they are out-dated and if you wear them everyone will know you are behind the curve.  Bother.  Well, you can wear them to bed, while you clean house, work in the yard (as long as nobody sees you), slop the hogs, you get the idea.

It's a brain thing. Eventually, your brain will reverse gears and you will see how ridiculous it was to purchase those things in the first place.  You won't want to put them on your body.  You won't even wear them to bed.  You will finally donate them somewhere.  tsk, tsk. Why waste your money in the first place?  Do you have that much disposable income?  If you see the freight train coming, move to another track and pass it by.  Do not turn your head and marvel at it's speed and pretty colors.  Do not let your brain tell you it is a good thing when you KNOW in your heart it is not.  Fads all end up the same. Fads fade fast. Don't let some crazed designer/decorator/hair dresser convince you in person or on tv, that a fad is 'you'!  You are smarter than that. No one is going to say, 'Hey, why didn't you get those tie-dyed pants everyone else got?' I promise they won't ask that question. Grab your common sense, keep your wallet closed and go out and look marvelous every day.

That's why we are here - to make you look better each time you step out of your abode!  Let me know how we're doing.

God bless you richly.  I know that He has blessed me!

Help! Help! Damage Control!

We talked previously about getting only one chance to make a first impression.  What if you messed that up?  What if you have already made your first impression and you, um, well, um, left quite a mc-nasty taste in the minds of those you viewed you?  NOW what do you do?  Damage control.  I will not sugar-coat this:  It is not always easy to undo what you ave set in someone's eyeballs.

Remember the 'cool' kids at school - the ones who always had it together.  Then there were the 'geeks' who used their brainpower to survive.  Those 'kickers' who could rock some boots and jeans.  What about the 'band nerds' who really did enjoy marching all over the football field.  The 'jocks' who actually knew what to do on a football field.  The 'goths' who went about always looking morose.  The 'theater' kids who knew that somehow their part in the I Act play would propel them to Hollywood.  There are so many more cliques - too many to list.  But, no matter how old you are, I am sure you can vividly recall where you fit in the school dynamics.  Maybe you fit in the 'uncategorized' - none of the above.  The thing is, everyone else who went to school with you - they also remember where you fit in the school dynamics.  Ouch - if you didn't fall into one of the really good groups.  And that was Years ago.  People remember.  So they will also remember that first impression you made (and will probably mentally categorize you).  It's painful, but true.  Are they going to categorize you as 'sloppy, lazy, indifferent'?

In this day of tough job competition, school competition, work competition, Life competition - you HAVE to put your best out there.  And while your best starts from the inside and works out, your appearance is what folks get first (they do in fact see you across the room, in the hall, at a table, in the store, etc.)

Too many people just don't seem to care.  WHY?  Do you want to seem 'sloppy, lazy, indifferent'?  Surely not. (I said this with a very quizzical face - because I am certain you want better).  Make an effort in your appearance.  Get up in the morning and start your day determined to be your best.  Put on clothes that Fit; clothes that Don't show your undies; clothes that are Not torn, dirty, stained or 'pilled' (pilling is just gross - always looks like bugs are leaving things on your apparel); clothes that don't stop at the fattest part of your calf; clothes that are meant to be worn in public (not your sleep shorts with hearts on them).  That is a very good start. In this day of technology - someone probably has a photo of you while you are Not at your best and it has been posted for all the world to see.  Let's change that.  Every day try to impress someone (let's pick YOU).  If YOU know you have put forth effort and followed those rules above - you will smile more and that will definitely make a better impression on the world!  Yea you!

Don't suffer when help is available.  Contact me and we'll improve things immediately.

God bless you richly.  I know that He has blessed me!

Is that you busting out all over?

How many times have you looked in your closet and bemoaned the fact that you ‘have nothing to wear’ (followed by a whimper)?  It happens to everyone – even people who have a giant closet full of clothes.  How is that even possible?  There are all kinds of reasons (we’ll talk about those another day) – but the most common reason is:

You can’t actually fit into those clothes anymore.

Sad, I know.  But there it is.  You have managed to gain a few pounds as the years rolled along.  After high school, you racked up the “freshman 15” as you sat in your college classes; then you got married and added on the “newlywed 10” as you no longer were required to look your best to snag a mate; then you had a baby and couldn’t loose those “final 5 (or 10)” pounds; and perhaps you repeated this last step.  Before you had time to look at yourself with a critical eye, you hardly recognized the person looking back from the mirror.

However you are not a spend-thrift and your clothes are still hanging in the closet that you wore prior to baby number two and even the wedding.  Why?  You like them.  You went to the store and picked them out and plopped good money down on the counter for them.  Therefore, they have real value and you should use them. Yup - that is why you justify squeezing your not-a-size-12-anymore* self into that 12.  See, you DID it!  Who is going to notice that the buttons are barely hanging onto that buttonhole?  Whoops, it couldn’t hang on anymore! Grab a safety pin and fix that (have you noticed that you actually went to the store and bought a giant box of safety-pins?).  And, your bitty pooch of a belly (well, it used to be bitty) appears to have stretched the seams of your bottoms in an unattractive manner – and those creases at your crotch, well, who’s going to notice anyway – you’ll be sitting down almost all day at the office.   So, off you go!  Out the door!  Blech.

Did you really step into public barely contained in your outfit?  It does not matter what the number says on your clothing tag. We are all aware that designers just make up those numbers anyway – there used to be a sizing standard, but that was before the world wrapped its arms and mouths around McDonald's.  Now, they pick a number that should make you happier.  Forget the number - you Must wear clothing that does not require a box of pins, duct tape, no deep breathing, slow moving only, and a big dose of prayer to get through your day.  Stretched seams and buttons (if they had feelings they would scream) look BAD.  Period.  No one has ever said, ‘you look So Skinny with your pulled out of shape outfit!’  It does not matter if you are a size 2 or a size 18 – if your clothes are too small, you look bigger.  As I have said before – no one Chooses to look bigger than they are.  So just say No.  You will look smaller, better, and less squishy if you wear what FITS. I promise. (Just don’t break those rules I talked about earlier.) There is something in that closet that fits your size.  And if not – give me a call and we’ll fix that!

* I use size 12 as 12-14 is supposed to be the average size – depending upon which survey you read.

Make your every impression matter.  

God bless you richly! I know that He has blessed me!

You Only Get to Make ONE First Impression

That is correct, you only get to make ONE first impression. I am currently on a trip with my hubby and he made the comment that no matter where I was, I would be the best dressed female there. (Okay, he is somewhat prejudiced. But, isn't that sweet!)

However, he really wasn't kidding. When we arrived at the airport - we were Stunned at the scene our eyeballs were treated to. It is fairly easy to recognize true, international travelers. They are very often relaxed, dressed in head to toe black with backpacks larger than themselves, hair disheveled in an 'on purpose' manner and sunglasses perched atop their disheveled heads. But oh those American traveling females!! Flip-flops, baggy shorts (or too-short shorts), sloppy, uncombed/dirty hair, forgot to put on real clothes, harried looking!

When we arrived at our destination, things did not change. When you walk down the aisle of any establishment, people see you. Some watch you. Some stare. Some gape open-mouthed in disbelief if you have wandered about in your jammies. Some smile. Some shake their heads. Some make the 'eeeww' face. But none the less, they see you and they respond. This is the first impression you leave with the world . I know, I know "but I'll never see these people again" you whine while wearing your SpongeBob flannels. Does that really matter? Is that your requirement to put some care into your appearance? That you might have a repeat sighting? Gracious! I KNOW you like yourself more than that!

I had people stop me to say how cute my jewelry or my skirt was. I don't wish to be the cause of anyone's "GROSS! That was UGLY!" face contortion. And neither do you. It is a far better feeling to know you are the one who put a smile on that face. If you put effort into yourself, you Will feel better, you Will walk a bit lighter, you Will make a better impression. Yup, only a moment to make a first impression.

Make your First Impression matter. Make it count for something! Make people enjoy the view!

God bless you richly! I know that He has blessed me!